The Myth of Control
In all of these circumstances, there is a point where she must relinquish control or even acknowledge that she has little to none. It is more than just fear at play. It is an understanding deep down that, try as she might, there are things beyond her control and a desperation to fight and change that.
The truth is there is no such thing as control, at least not for us created beings. We like to think that if only we could have complete control over the people and circumstances in our lives, things would be better and we would find the safety, security, and peace we crave. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Control is a myth, a lie. The reality is that our shoulders were never meant to bear the weight of control and we could never endure its load. Only God is wise enough and strong enough to exert control over all living things at every moment without ceasing.
Control Versus Stewardship
The definition of control is to have the power of ruling, regulating, limiting, and dominating a person or circumstance. While this may sound harsh and severe to us, our God is able to exert His authority and control over creation with perfect wisdom and steadfast love. In His hands, control is a loving, protective tool.
“Behold, all souls are Mine; the soul of the father as well as the soul of the son is mine.” Ezek. 18:4
We are stewards of Emersyn’s life and heart, a powerful responsibility. But we are not her Sovereign. As we seek to love her and steward her well, we must often remind ourselves that our goal is not to control or subjugate her to our will but to point her to Christ in such a way that she gladly kneels to His rule in her life.
The Fallout of Fighting for Control
I’ll be honest, I know the truth about control in my head, but my heart so often deceives me into fighting for control anyway. Each time I do, I face the inevitable consequences.
Consider the words of author and pastor John Onwuchekwa:
“Prayer reminds us that control is an illusion, a farce. We don’t have it. But, far from driving us to depression, I think this fact drives us to dependence. When we depend on God, we see Him in a whole new light. We’re reminded that the God that we serve is eager to do good to us. This is not a God that has to be coerced into solving our problems . . . More than that, God Himself tells us the things that we should pray for so that we don’t have to invent them all ourselves. God is eager to come through. He’s eager to bless, to help His children.”
Not only can we take comfort knowing God is eager to help us in our trials and difficulties, but He is also using them to grow, strengthen, and conform us into Christlikeness. He is not arbitrary or capricious in what He allows into our lives. He is purposeful and He is faithful. So, when life becomes tumultuous and you feel yourself grasping for control, remember who He is. Call to Him in prayer and trust His perfect wisdom.
When life seems to be spiraling out of control, we need never doubt He has a plan, a perfect plan. His purposes cannot be thwarted (Job 42:2). No, control is not a burden we need ever bear. Our goal, our responsibility is to live in a way that honors Him, that points to His greatness.
“The Lord Will Provide” is a precious song to my husband and me. We sang it at our wedding almost ten years ago. It meant much to us back then and even more now that we’ve lived a decade of life together. I am always challenged by its words and the call to live in dependence on God, confident that He will never fail us. I share its final words with you and pray you will be encouraged and emboldened to trust Him more each day. Let’s live fully committed to Him and His purposes for us, knowing He is able and eager to bring all things together for good!
How have you seen God bring all things together for good after you yielded your control?
8/29/2022 11:16:57 am
Oh, my! What a powerful post. I think we all struggle with wanting to feel as though we're in control, but, like you said, control is an illusion. I loved what you said about the difference between control and stewardship; I'll be keeping that in mind.
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