I don’t say this lightly. It’s been almost a decade since my son left my arms to be with Jesus. I remember it all like it was yesterday.
You can read more of my story and grief processing on my blog here.
How does this verse apply to such deep pain?
“I [Jesus] came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” John 10:10
I didn’t feel like I had abundant life. My baby didn’t have abundant life. So what is Jesus talking about?
Two things come to mind:
So… (just processing this through as I write) Jesus’ friends will sorrow so so deeply. But then Jesus rising from the dead and all that that means will be so impactful and life-changing that their joy will overshadow—maybe even push out completely—the sorrow they felt.
That joy must be pretty incredible!
So what is the catalyst for this joy?
Is it because Jesus says that when they see Him again, He’ll have a good gift for them?
Is it because Jesus says He will remove pain and brokenness from our current lives?
No. Jesus doesn’t say that.
The cause of this joy is Jesus Himself.
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Soli Deo Gloria,
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4/4/2023 09:58:42 am
"So often my reaction to pain is for Jesus to take me out of it." Oh yes. I appreciate this honest, heart-felt post. Pain causes us to wrestle with what we thought we knew. Thankfully, those who wrestle with God, like Jacob, come out blessed on the other side, even if they're left with a limp.
4/13/2023 09:08:56 am
Debbie, I love that reminder of wrestling with God and being blessed. I never thought of it like that before. Thank you for sharing!
One of my very favorite books is The Insanity of God - it really speaks into a mama's loss - and so many losses. The devil persecutes God's children. Persecution looks like cancer, addiction, the loss of a child (at all stages of life). In TIOG, Ripkin says, "After every crucifixion, comes resurrection." The book deals with how Christianity thrives in persecution. I am so glad that when we cannot make our own joy in our sorrows, that we can find it in Him. Thank you for your post today - for all those mama's needing lifting up in these hard places.
4/4/2023 05:03:06 pm
I'm so sad for your loss. Sending you a big hug! Thank you for your vulnerability in loss and your willingness to comfort others following behind you who are also suffering loss. I four little ones in heaven, and I am at a place of peace that they behold His face.
4/13/2023 12:07:08 pm
Oh Lisa, having 1 in heaven is so hard. I can’t imagine 4! Praise God for bringing you to a place of peace. What do you feel was one of the most helpful things in getting there?
4/4/2023 06:16:32 pm
Thank you for sharing your journey of loss Kathy. To lose a child at any age is a devastating thing, I know that loss as I lost my daughter Candy & my only son Benjamin to stillbirths within a year of each other.
4/13/2023 12:11:22 pm
Jennifer, that is so incredibly hard to lose 2 within a year. The pain is so deep. But it shows the immensity of God’s comfort and strength to be able to help you through that and since.
4/4/2023 09:18:36 pm
I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing what you've learned. I have a couple of children who have walked through mental health struggles and we've grappled with the grief of lost dreams and fears of suicide. But I know you're right--New abundant life is connected to unstealable joy. And that joy is in Him!
4/13/2023 12:15:43 pm
I have a dear friend who’s child has a disability and she was one of the few people who really knew how to be with me in my pain and really empathize. You are totally right - moms can experience deep loss and grieve for a lifetime whether it’s lost hopes and dreams or lost life. All are extremely hard. We all need Jesus so much.
4/5/2023 07:58:28 am
I am so sorry for your loss. Your transparency is sure to be both an encouragement and a help to those who experience such loss as well. I am so grateful Jesus steps into our pain with us and brings hope even as we process the grief. Blessings to you!
4/13/2023 12:16:41 pm
Thank you, Joanne. To God be the glory!
4/8/2023 01:38:56 pm
We all want to avoid pain when we can but God often does his greatest work in us during those times when we must cling to Him. Thanks for helping us better understand these truths.
4/13/2023 12:17:48 pm
Thank you, Donna. To God be the glory!
4/12/2023 12:15:30 pm
Having also lost a child, I appreciate what you're sharing here, Kathy. It took me awhile to find my joy again, and even then, it was tempered with the reality that bad things can happen to anyone, at anytime. But knowing I'll not be alone in whatever next hard thing happens has helped me.
4/13/2023 12:22:34 pm
Hi Lisa, Thank you for sharing that not being alone has helped you with your loss. It’s so hard, but Praise the Lord! That truth really helped carry my husband through (and still does). For me, that didn’t help me as much. But it was because I didn’t know why God’s presence made such a difference. Learning who God is helped me realize that his presence is my greatest treasure.
4/16/2023 10:44:46 am
Kathy, I'm so sorry for your loss. I appreciate your transparency and vulnerability here. This touched my soul today
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