5 Ways to Raise Grateful Children in an Entitled World

How many times have you told your child to say “thank you?” Probably a lot. Did you know that gratitude will have beneficial effects on your child's well-being? In fact, research has shown that children who express gratitude on a regular basis have more positive emotions, like joy, love, and happiness, and fewer negative emotions, such as bitterness, envy, and resentment. They also have increased feelings of connectedness and improved relationships with peers and adults alike. They experience greater satisfaction in school and improved academic achievement. They even have better physical health than children who don’t take the time to notice and appreciate the good things around them. ​This is powerful stuff! ​As parents, we can help our children develop an attitude of gratitude through a variety of simple acts and activities. Let's equip you with a few tools to raise grateful children in an entitled world and help them feel and express gratitude regularly.

5 Ways to Raise Grateful Children in an Entitled World

1. Model practicing gratitude. Attitudes are contagious. Express an attitude of gratitude by saying thank you to your family, friends, neighbors, and strangers. Be sure your children see you being grateful.
   
   
2. Encourage grateful thinking. For example, if your child wins the spelling bee, help them identify those who helped along the way. Suggest they say thank you in person or by writing a note to someone who helped make that possible.
   
   
3. Share gratitude daily. Make time in the morning (maybe during breakfast or the car ride to school), or at dinner, for family members to share at least one thing they are grateful for that day. This can be balanced with one thing that was difficult that day. But let's start with gratitude. By doing so you will make positive connections between the two.
   
   
4. Reinforce grateful behavior. Watch for grateful behavior or language in your child. Identify it when it happens and acknowledge it. For example: “That was thoughtful of you to thank your friend for helping you with homework. Good for you!”
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5. Use visual reminders. Put notes in your child’s lunchbox reminding them to be thankful for their health, siblings, pet, etc. Text your child and remind them to count their blessings. Share something that you are grateful for.

Two Gratitude Activities

Make a Grateful Sayings poster. Get a piece of poster board and write For This I Am Grateful in big, bold letters across the top. Ask everyone in your family to write (or draw) something they are grateful for on the poster. It can be something big, like getting an A on a test or winning the soccer championship, or something small, like getting to stay up an extra 15 minutes or taking a fun walk with Dad. Ask each family member to put their name or initials under what they write or draw. Keep the poster up all month so that everybody can continue adding to it. By making this a month-long activity, you are showing your family that gratitude is something we can experience every day if we take the time to notice it. At the end of the month, bring the poster to the dinner table and take turns reading aloud what was written or drawn.

Keep a gratitude journal. (see example below) Most of us spend far more time thinking about how we can correct something that has gone wrong, worrying about something that is about to go wrong (or will never go wrong), or simply replaying a failure or setback, than we do basking in what has gone right and being grateful for our everyday blessings.

You can help your child notice what goes well in their life and build gratitude by keeping a gratitude journal. Analyzing why events go well, what the positive events mean to them, and how they can create circumstances that enable more good things to occur. These activities encourage a consciousness of blessings and gratitude and promotes optimism.

​Each night, set aside a few minutes with your child and have them write down 3 positive events from the day. These things can be relatively small in importance like, my mom made my favorite dessert, or relatively large in importance like, my leg has finally healed and I got my cast off today. The positive events can be things that they brought on, I got an A on my math test, or that they witnessed, my sister helped my brother with his homework when mom was busy. The positive events can also be things noticed in nature like, a cool looking bird was sitting outside my window and I enjoyed watching it.

Next to each positive event that your child lists, have them write a reflection (just a sentence or two) on any of the topics below:

• Why this good thing happened
• What this good thing means to them
• What ways they or others contributed to this good thing
• What they can do tomorrow to enable more of this good thing
• What they learned from taking the time to name this good thing

So, How Do We Raise Grateful Children in This Entitled World?

By being grateful parents and examples of gratitude. Encourage grateful thinking. Sharing gratitude every day. Reinforcing grateful behavior with positive benefits. Use visual reminders of gratitude around your home.

​Looking for Scripture related to gratitude? Checkout our 36 Verses of Thanksgiving & Praise post.

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​The 3-Minute Gratitude Journal for Kids

A journal that teaches children to practice gratitude and mindfulness. The 3-Minute Gratitude Journal is a guide to cultivate an attitude of gratitude in your children. It is a self exploration journal designed to focus on being thankful for what we have, the big things in life, as well as the simple joys. Each well designed, kid-friendly daily spread contains space to list 3 things they are thankful for, a person who brought them joy and how they felt about their day. If they start each day by writing down 3 things they are thankful for—a family, a favorite teacher, starting a good book—they begin each day on the right note. Doing this daily, will help your child create a habit of focusing on the blessings they have been given! Grab a copy for a friend and let them share the journey together!

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How have you been intentional about raising your children to be grateful humans in this atmosphere of entitlement we live in?