12 Letters I Wrote to a Friend With Cancer

Being diagnosed with cancer can be a terrifying experience! It can bring about so many negative thoughts, like fear of the unknown and physical pain, as well as mental stress.

If you have a friend with cancer, as I do, you may not know how to help them. I didn’t. But I decided to share some words of encouragement with her and hope they help her remember she is never alone.
 
I wrote 12 letters to my friend who is battling cancer today—one to open on the day of each of her 12 chemotherapy treatments.

Before her first treatment, I bundled the handwritten letters, wrapped them with a pretty ribbon, and took them to her.

I hope, by sharing this, you too will be able to encourage a friend battling cancer.

In every letter, I wanted to bring out the truths we know about our God:

• In the first four letters, I wrote of how our God is BIG and He gives comfort and rest to the restless.
• Weeks five through eight I wrote of how our God is Faithful and He calms the anxious soul.
• Finally, the last four letters centered around how our God is our Hope even if life seems hopeless.

I added an encouraging note, Scripture, a quote, and some other fun things like a pair of cute earrings, perfume sample, Scripture card, Christmas ornament, and of course some confetti to each of the letters.

Here’s what I wrote:

These are uncertain Times. I want you to know that you are not alone. You have a team of doctors and a team of family and friends. We are all rooting for you today. But better than all of that, you have God on your side.
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“Come to Me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and. . . you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:28-29
 
Truths I know about God: God is Big! He gives comfort & rest in our restlessness.
“ …Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread. . . for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6 
 
Today, we are going to focus on the fight and not the fright!

Did you know that our God is a God of all comfort? Of course you did. But did you know He comforts us so that we will be able to comfort others? The comfort you are going to be able to give to others just got a whole lot bigger!
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“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, Who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
 
Truths I know about God: God is Big! He gives comfort & rest in our restlessness.
“On the day I called, You answered me; my strength of soul You increased.” Psalm 138:3 
 
Your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other resolution.

In our distress we call and He hears. Prayer is such a lovely thing. Some of it is asking. Some is confessing. Some is praising His name and some is just listening to that still small voice. But it’s nice to know He always hears us!

“In my distress I called upon the Lord; to my God I cried for help. From His temple He heard my voice, and my cry to Him reached His ears.” Psalm 18:6
 
Truths I know about God: God is Big! He gives comfort & rest in our restlessness.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6 
 
Live a life of balance – Pray and meditate. Draw and paint. Sing and dance.

Cast all your anxiety on Him. He cares for YOU! The anxiety of the new and the unknown is huge. With every step you take on this journey there are unknowns lurking around the corner, but so is God, and He cares!
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"Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time He may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:6-7
 
Truths I know about God: God is Big! He gives comfort & rest in our restlessness.
“But God, Who comforts the downcast, comforted us. . .” 2 Corinthians 7:6  
 
Cancer can take away my physical abilities, but it cannot touch my mind. It cannot touch my heart and it cannot touch my soul.

God is near in our afflictions and will deliver us. God as our deliverer is such a lovely visual. Never believe that He won’t give you more than you can handle. He will! Because if He didn’t, you would never need a Deliverer.
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“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers Him out of them all.” Psalm 34:18-19
 
Truths I know about God: God is Faithful! He calms our anxieties.
“In my distress I called upon the Lord; to my God I called. From His temple He heard my voice, and my cry came to His ears.” 2 Samuel 22:7
 
Don’t lose hope. When the sun goes down, the stars come out.

NOTHING can separate us from the love of God. NOTHING! Not sickness. Not pain. Not loneliness. Not uncertainty. Today, can you just picture His loving arms around you? Leading you. Holding you. Guiding you. Nothing can separate you from this.
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“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39
 
Truths I know about God: God is Faithful! He calms our anxieties.
“Our soul waits for the LORD; He is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in Him, because we trust in His holy name. Let Your steadfast love, O LORD, be upon us, even as we hope in You.” Psalm 33:20-22 
 
Faith is daring to go beyond what the eyes can see.

Halfway Point!

This is where we throw some confetti.

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Download the "12 Letters I Wrote to My Friend With Cancer" printable

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Do not fear this walk through the valley. We all have valleys to walk through. Many have been through this valley before you, and many walk in your footsteps. Do not be afraid. You are strong and God is with you every step of the way!
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“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.” Psalm 23:4
 
Truths I know about God: God is Faithful! He calms our anxieties.
“. . .do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 
 
More than 10 million Americans are living with cancer, and they demonstrate the ever-increasing possibility of living beyond cancer.

Make Him known! You have a unique opportunity to testify of God’s goodness when you are going through a trial. Divine opportunities come our way and if we blink we may miss them. Keep looking for the opportunities!

“Sing to Him, sing praises to Him; tell of all His wondrous works!” Psalm 105:2
 
Truths I know about God: God is Faithful! He calms our anxieties.
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11 
 
Some days there won’t be a song in your heart. Sing anyway.

He is your strength and help. He will uphold you. Physical strength may be difficult to come by these days. You may feel washed out or worn out. You might even feel ready to throw in the towel. Don’t quit! Rest. Give yourself time. Don’t try to do too much.

“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10
 
Truths I know about God: God is our Hope, even if life seems hopeless.
“The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with Him in order that we may also be glorified with Him.” Romans 8:16-17 
 
The ultimate measure of a woman is not where she stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where she stands at a time of challenge and controversy.

​Call upon His name. He will deliver. Again, He is your Deliverer. Call on His name. And when you see the delivery coming, like the Israelites saw at the Red Sea, give Him the glory He deserves. He WILL deliver you!

“Call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.” Psalm 50:15
 
Truths I know about God: God is our Hope, even if life seems hopeless.
“For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.” Romans 8:24-25 
 
The wish for healing has always been half of health.

He is good. He is your stronghold. Take refuge in Him! A refuge. A stronghold. A good God. This is what we need today and every day. We need His strength—sometimes just to take the next breath. He is so good!
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“The Lord is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble; He knows those who take refuge in Him.” Nahum 1:7
 
Truths I know about God: God is our Hope, even if life seems hopeless.
“By awesome deeds You answer us with righteousness, O God of our salvation, the hope of all the ends of the earth and of the farthest seas.” Psalm 65:5
 
Every day that I challenge this cancer and survive is a victory.

Cast your burden. He will sustain YOU! He has gotten you this far and you are almost done with this chemo thing! He knows your burdens and your battles. He knows your daily needs and He WILL sustain you!
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“Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved.” Psalm 55:22
 
Truths I know about God: God is our Hope, even if life seems hopeless.
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to His great mercy, He has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.” 1 Peter 1:3 
 
When written in Chinese, the word ‘crisis’ is composed of two characters—one represents danger, the other represents opportunity.

In every letter I added some special stickers. We still love stickers even when we’re grownups, don’t we? I know I do. The weeks six and twelve letters I filled with pink confetti. I hope that didn’t make too big a mess in the chemo treatment room. In one of the letters I placed a small Christmas ornament. Her treatments will be finished around Christmas, so I thought this would be a little glimmer of hope. (For once I was thankful that Hobby Lobby puts their Christmas décor out in the middle of summer!)
 
I wanted every one of these letters to be filled with hope. Like I wrote at the beginning, I wanted her to be reminded that she is not alone, and I wanted my letters to direct her gaze to God. That’s really all we can do sometimes in this life isn’t it? Gaze on God. Meditate on His Word. Pray. Talk to Him. Listen to His still small voice and remember that even with the number of hairs on my head changing daily (mine are and I’m not even undergoing chemo treatments) He knows the number. We are never forgotten, never alone, and we are valuable to Him!

“Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.” Luke 12:6-7

What experience have you had as a caregiver, or friend, comforting someone with cancer?